Articles

Jan 08 2014

Winter in our neck of the woods…

Author: Kerry

We enjoyed the break between Christmas and New Years as a family… part of that time believe it or not was spent outdoors… Even us big kids joined in … bahahaha so the funny thing about this post is… as I started to type this I thought MY GOD… I’m writing a normal post! that never ever happens! I’m sharing normal family winter fun… I open the pictures on this cute little mac and they are all turned the right direction… and BOOM … I am normal!!! I load them into wordpress… and well…. here you go… I swear… just tilt your damn head.

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This post is brought to you by the letters M and K and the number 1

MamaKats is number 1!!

mama kats

Dec 11 2013

Death of the Stache

Author: Kerry

mama katsCapture a conversation shared between kids.

I am cheating… lets just get that out of the way right now… because there is a conversation that happened tonight … between Small Child and Mr. Amazing (Who I understand technically is not a  kid… but he plays video games… and makes up song lyrics about pooping… and twerks … so I rest my case) … and I am going to have to paraphrase a bit… even though this took place only an hour and a half ago… memories get sketchy under great duress… so you get the following

Mr Amazing: Dude, that stache has got to go… Like tonight… I can’t let you go to school again with that on your face… I will get one of your moms razors and some soap and do it if I have too

Small Child: REALLY? Because she won’t let me shave!!

Me: <Nothing because I am DYING INSIDE>

Mr Amazing: He needs to shave it tonight

Small Child: I’ll get the shaving kit!

Tall child gave him this as a gift when he was 12 much to his delight, and much to my dismay, which I promptly took away and “hid” in the top of the hall closet, apparently not fooling anyone because he got it right away

Mr Amazing: You have to charge it first

Small Child flips the switch and it buzz’s to life… assholes.

Mr Amazing: Curl your lip like this and go up and down over it until you get all the hair off

Small Child: Does it hurt?

Mr Amazing: No, its just like getting a hair cut

Small Child: I’m Nervous!

He walks into the bathroom, does the weird poke his lip out wrapping it around his teeth face at the mirror and begins BUTCHERING my very SOUL… I hear the hair cutting from his face… that I had been properly ignoring for the last 30 days or so… as the “peach fuzz” turned  brown and no matter how many times I told him to wash his face it just wouldn’t come off

Mr Amazing: You missed a spot!!

Small Child: Did I get it?

Mr Amazing: Hold still … gimme that…

Small Child: I got this!

More buzzing

Mr Amazing: There! Looks much better!

Small Child: Can I use aftershave

AFTER SHAVE??? HE HAS AFTER SHAVE??? Apparently he does! Because he comes back all man smelling.

Me: We are celebrating this manhood with Gingerbread shakes!

Translation: Im eating my feelings… with a Gingerbread Shake!

THE END (of my story, and the conversation, and my sanity and HIS CHILDHOOD! Dammit)

Stach

Nov 25 2013

Attitude of Gratitude

Author: Kerry

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Attitude-of-Gratitude

Grandsons & Grandpa. 

Real Friends – mine are real & mine rock!

Acts of kindness. “Kindness is my religion” Dalai Lama

Three beautiful children I call my own. (Even if I have to share them)

Iced Coffee – Not just because it started with an I either.

Time, coffee time, dinnertime, family time, extra time, borrowed time.

Unusual circumstances- This is how I met Mr. Amazing, I love him so much!

Dude, this is harder than I thought it would be when I started this.

Everyone reading this blog! TADA! I Fucking Did it!

 

 

Nov 06 2013

Well… That didn’t go exactly as planned.

Author: Kerry

mama kats

Something you were wrong about.

I am a budget-er… I know… I know… with all the frivolity that carries on in my life this may be hard to believe… but it is true never the less.

I pay my bills on a schedule from which I never deviate.. and I put away what I can when I can… Recently I paid off a debt… and suddenly this freed up a little bit of money… breathing room… barely… and my plan was to put it away and save it for a rainy day.. which is a luxury I have never had in my adult life… not once… and it was going so well… So well… I was able to finally take a family vacation… somewhere a little further away than a 2 day over the weekend trip up to the lake… and we rejoiced.. and the children were happy… Then as the time has continued without paying this debt… I tucked enough away again to consider finally purchasing a new bed… which is something we definitely want…  we began discussing shopping for one to see what we would want… and the parents were happy … and we rejoiced… because we are good… we do not go into debt and finance things … we pay our bills and we buy things we can afford… responsible adults we are.

… this last weekend we decided to go out to eat… the restaurant we chose happen to be in the same shopping location as the Apple Store… you already know what I am going to type here don’t you… you can feel the guilt seeping from my finger tips and into the keyboard of my brand new MacBook Air…. guilt is swirling around the words on my beautifully clear retina screen… as I sit with this 2.38 lb piece of heaven in my lap… on my too small… too lumpy bed… with it’s 12 hours of battery life… I have that A-Ha moment…

I thought I was a responsible selfless adult… I was wrong… I’m a semi-responsible MacBook owning chic who finally bought something for herself… and I was happy… and I am rejoicing… ooohhh its so shiny!!

Mac

Hey Apple – If you happen to find this…and want to reward your #1 fan… we could totally use a new bed.

Shiny!

Oct 29 2013

For better or for Worse… I am

Author: Kerry

mama kats

Hi, my name is ______ and I am a _______.

Hi… My name is Kerry… and I am a Human Being.

… I wanted to put so many other things in that spot… I ran through every positive thing about myself I could put in there… and mentally these were quickly replaced with every vice I have put into name calling form as well… I am my own best friend… and my own worst enemy all wrapped up in one… I motivate myself and set goals… I am a driven individual… I also tear myself down… tell myself I am not capable of reaching dreams… I am a Self Sabotager… I am a friend… I thought of my closest friends and how much they mean to me… and how much I love them… and want to be there for them… and I am an unreliable friend… who oftens stands people up… overbooks herself… and is guilty of only calling when I need help… I am a wife… I am a nag… I am a confidant… I am an instigator… for better or for worse… I will judge you… and I will tell you… I guess that is just part of the package deal…. I am the only person I know that can beat herself up for beating herself up… I am a Mom…  the good and the bad… and I love fiercely! I am a self harmer…. albeit in remission… also an addict… also not in practice… I am a woman… but my boobs are not that great… just say’n

I am a human being… for better or worse… and I will forgive myself a thousand mistakes a day… and borrow from the next if I am having a really rough go at it.

 

Mom

 

Oct 01 2013

The Cookie Wife…

Author: Kerry
mama kats Share a Fall recipe that you’re loving this season.
Soooo I don’t really cook… or bake… But I do love me some fall recipes… So let me let you in on a little secret I have… It’s kind of a magical thing…. I live in Utah… Where not only do plural marriages have a reputation of being practiced… but some of the best baking happens! So I did the only logical thing I could do …. I took a cookie wife! You heard me right!

 

me:  <Yawn/stretch/puts an arm over her shoulder move/Drops Recipe in lap>

Cookie Wife:  Aren’t you hilarious???

me:  Smoooooth… I believe the word you were looking for is smooth

Cookie Wife:  Or subtle…

me:  Bahahaha!

Cookie Wife:  Guess what is the best thing ever??

me: ??

Cookie Wife:  Maple blueberry sausage!!! I’ll bet I could make it just as yummy with ground turkey!

me: MMMMMMMMMMMMMM I wanna eat it all!

Cookie Wife:  I made blueberry pancakes, maple blueberry sausage, crock pot hash brown scrambled eggs & juice & milk.

me:  … Small Child ate at school … I ate a leftover taco time bean burrito.

 

HAPPY OCTOBER EVERYONE!!!

October

Sep 23 2013

Its the finer things…. really.

Author: Kerry

WARNING- THIS MAY ONLY BE FUNNY TO THE SLEEP DEPRIVED.

me:  I should grocery shop tonight…I so way don’t even want to!

Mr. Amazing:  I am really sorry (it’s what I say now right?)

me:   it’s cool… It just means you are getting fried chicken and potato logs for dinner

Mr. Amazing:   🙁

me:  So if that doesn’t sound good for dinner… what does

Mr. Amazing: Sounds good = tomatoes and cucumbers in vinegar with fancy cheese and crackers

me:  Oohhhh That sounds yummy… What else should I be buying… I gotta be honest… my head is not in the game… I don’t even know what that means

Mr. Amazing:   I was laughing when I read that  I imagined the announcer voice… “oooh Kerry’s heads not in the game, what d’ya think Chuck” “Well Bill, Kerry normally scores in the high 300s, today may be a down day.” “Well Chuck let’s hope that she can find the groove as she heads down to the frozen foods section”

me:  Really… I just pictured me standing in the middle of the fruit and veggie sections screaming FUMBLE! Wanna do some potatoes again?

Mr. Amazing:   lol, that sounds good

me:  What else sounds good…You be in charge dammit!

Mr. Amazing:  dammit- clam chowder in sourdough bread bowls

me:  Ohhhh that sounds good

Mr. Amazing:  spaghetti with beef tips and veggies in spicy sauce with aged mozzarella, capers and olives

me:  Uhhhhhhhh

Mr. Amazing:   with rosemary bread on the side

me:  BAHAHAHAHA! That’s the funniest shit you have said all day…I say fuck this whole shopping idea, we are eating at 7-11… Slurpee’s for dessert?

Mr. Amazing:  cannolis stuffed with spiced sausage and spices with noodles and marinara with myzithra cheese

me:  <headdesk>

Mr. Amazing:  with pistachio cheesecake and raspberry sauce

me:  Meow

Mr. Amazing:  and…

me:  You should have married your cookie wife if you didn’t want to eat at 7-11 for dinner

Mr. Amazing:   hand trimmed steaks marinated in lime chili sauce with rice and veggies in a light cheese/butter sauce with some sparkling spumante grape juice and some ice cream on top of homemade peach pie for desert

there, done… any other questions?

me:  Okay… Crack head… Taquitos then?

Mr. Amazing: :  ROFLMAO or you should get a super awesome job and I will stay home and cook and hire a maid to clean

me:  YOU should! I will stay home and boss her around… The maid

Mr. Amazing:   Like a BOSS

me:  She will have to cook too

Mr. Amazing:   lemon blueberry cheesecake with marscapone and whipped cream and lemon zest on top

me:  No Slurpee for you! you ingrate!

Mr. Amazing:  okay, okay I want a Slurpee and an all beef hot dog

me:  ROTFLMAO! I am not really going to 7-11 But I love that you settled … on dinner… on life… you know… in general

Mr. Amazing:  like I am going to lose my Slurpee

me:  BAHAHAHA!  Its the finer things in life that get us through

Mr. Amazing:   yes, like wine flavored soda pop

me: Exactly!

UPDATED – What he came home too:

download

Sep 16 2013

A day in the life…

Author: Kerry

mama kats Take a picture every hour and show us what a day in your life is like.

I haven’t been super bloggy like lately…… I’ve been having a rough go at things… I read back through my blog to Septembers past… and realize I am in the same place… that I always survive… that I always blog again… even though in this place it seems completely impossible to imagine surviving the next 48 hours…  I know I will… What is going on.. is it literally just drowning in memories? Is it the time of year. the change of seasons? is it all in my head? I do not really know where it comes from, if it is real or not… It is real enough feeling… I imagine being somewhere where I can shut down all my senses, all the noises, all light and touch… I imagine my brain not being able to think… … Just for a day… It is like walking through tar… if I stop walking it will settle and firm up…So I don’t… and just like this dark place was entered with no real reason… I will walk into the lighter place again… and my legs will be less heavy… and I will become more engaged in my surroundings again… I will not make any life changing decisions in this dark place… and I will not bring others to it with me…. It is going to be okay… It is always going to be okay…and this prompt sounded fun… So regardless of my feelings I keep moving… Here is what my day looks like today…

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I woke up… showered… got dressed… (Saved your life and didn’t take a picture that hour)… and got out the door. (7 am)

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Took my most adorable creeper to school…

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Made my 30 minute commute as the sun beamed its way through the clouds, and didn’t crash into the idiots taking pictures of the massive rainbow that made its debut in the morning traffic. (Take note: No Rainbow Picture!)

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 Finally arrived here where I will spend the next 9 hours of the day…. (8 am)

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Imagine this on repeat until 5 pm… Save me the trouble of reposting (I love my job, and I am grateful for it)

Tshirts

Mid-day jaunt through the warehouse to search for something that the warehouse manager & his adorable British accent are too busy to find…. 20 minutes of walking a creepy dark warehouse with thousands upon thousands of boxes…. then finding it under his desk… (FTW… WOOT!) (1 pm)

counter Nearing the 5 o’clock hour… I allow myself to watch the Disneyland count down… for a moment… or ten. (4 pm)

Finally… Made the drive home… decided to bag the whole preparing of food for the day…. (6 pm) Chinese it is!

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Here goes the night time routine…. Music Practice… Voice, Viola and Piano…

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Next is a shower (7 pm)

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This is the look Mr. Amazing gives me when I tell him I need his Mac to finish up my blog… because I have to blog each hour or I will forget… bahaha damn he is cute (8 pm)

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Feeding of the beasties!!! OMG we are almost there!!! (9 pm)

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Finally… My Sanctuary… Back in bed… See… I didn’t think I could do it… but not only did I do it… I did it with pictures!

Sweet Dreams!!! GoodNight!!! (10 pm)

 

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