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Right here… still… waiting for you :)

mama kats                        The first concert you ever attended.

 

I think I was about 15 years old… those years are fuzzy… and I am old… I was sitting on a grassy hill… under the stars in beautiful Park City, Utah… wondering if people around me were smoking pot or dancing in a mosh pit somewhere like I had heard about… But somehow I just don’t think that was happening here…

People swayed … Girls cried…. I’m sure more than one mullet got laid that night.

We ate at McDonalds on the way home… living the dream people… living the dream…

I think tar and feathers are an appropriate punishment.

I accept this.

Nectar of the Gods… Wordless Wednesday

They should pay me for this shit…. instead… they treat me like any other Jamba Juice crack addict… and sell me another one… this was dinner last night 🙂

Jamba

But the best thing this is… ha ha… your looking at it…Who would have thought someone would look at my jamba juice… and Yes, thats my kitchen counter…. it is as fabulous as it looks 🙂

 

Coffee…. Coffee Coffee…. Coffee Coffee Coffee

mama kats                        “Write a post inspired by the word: Coffee”

The biggest compliment in my world that I can give is “I love you more than coffee” … Because to know me… is to know my obsession with coffee…. I love iced in the summer… hot in the winter and fall… Vanilla flavoring… Hazelnut…. dark roast… free trade …. organic… oh my god… I totally typed orgasmic instead of organic right there…. it might be a little too close to the truth for my comfort…. Mmmmm Coffee

I drink it downtown… mom and pop shops… even the evil Starbucks… I buy my beans from a local roaster… I grind them at home… All good things come with coffee:  Sunday Mornings are my favorite… Sunday Morning on CBS… coffee in my over-sized Winnie the pooh cup… Wednesday Night Lessons… dropping small child off at piano and driving through with Mr. Amazing for something warm and caffeinated (He is a chai guy) … I remember getting through many college years solely on coffee…. Even Folgers coffee… from my friends pot… with coffee mate creamer… and fake sugar is like a comforting hug from the safest place on earth….

Coffee scented candles, Chocolate covered coffee beans, coffee flavored toffee…. I love it!

coffee-poster

You think I am a little crazy… admit it… obsessed even… but I totally didn’t write this poem about coffee…

 

An Ode To Coffee

By Ray DavidsonSleep is for the weak, someone I know once said,
I want to feel alive and not just temporarily dead,Tis’ better to be conscious, than to sleep away our life,
Besides it gives us more time to deal with all our strife.Oh the nay sayers will say, you are crazy to be like that,
Who wants to give up that bed to put on their coat and hat?To go off to work and play and start another grueling day,
Mister you are really crazy, to be thinking like that way.But I have a secret weapon to fight away those dreams,
These things can pack a whallop, these special little beans.

They give me rise to chaos and funny nonsense like this,
To write such goofy things and make me feel this bliss,

That I get from drinking coffee, it has me to spread it’s voice,
Coffee, the breakfast of champions, caffeine the drug of choice.

So sleep away your cares, you’re all a bunch of lazies!
I’ve got to go work and deal with all those bunch of crazies.

So goodbye to you in slumber when everyone is at that brink.
There’ll be no sleep for this guy, well, maybe just a wink.

Giant Gummy Say What??

 

Mr Amazing:

bottleVanillaCola_499.1

 

Mr Amazing: This just doesn’t look right – looks like you could buy it at one of those “slumber parties”

 

wormBlueCherry_499.1

 

Me: UMM OMG OMG!!! You bought me that giant gummy coke right? RIGHT?

Mr Amazing: Nope, did you read my comment on the gummy worm?

Me: I read it… But I got sidetracked by the thought of that coke bottle!

Mr Amazing:

laffyTaffy_499

 

Me: Would you focus! GIANT GUMMY COKE BOTTLE!

((Gross on the giant gummy worm btw.))

And then he was 14…

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You are horrified… no doubt… that I am writing about you on your birthday.

Perhaps if I were a better mother… I’d save this letter… give it to you privately. But I’m your mother… some days better than other days… and today… while you sleep I wrap your gifts …  minecraft … spiderman… you really are still you…

Did you know that when you were two years old… you clapped liked a crazy man on my birthday? Every candle I blew out… every gift I opened… you clapped and clapped in excitement…  I don’t remember what the cake looked like… I don’t remember what gifts I received… I just remember your smiling face, your happy eyes, your blonde hair… I’ve hated every birthday of mine… but that one… My gosh, I loved you then.

When you were ten… we had a fight over schoolwork … frustrated… I went to my room and closed my door and screamed at you that I wanted to be alone… And I laid on my bed… trying to figure out how to mother a growing boy with a distinct personality of his own… how to make everything all right… And when you walked into my room, I asked you what you were doing… and I wasn’t kind… And I said, “I don’t know what to do about this.” And you said, “Maybe we could forgive each other.” And that remains the most humbling moment of my life… My gosh, I loved you then.

In your 13th year you buried your father… You played your recital piece for his funeral… for him…  And I knew that I would never have been brave enough to do that … My gosh, I loved you then.

 You made me a mom… And you made being a mom easy.

You… quiet… learning how to be a man while still being a boy…  Sometimes needing me and sometimes not.

And now at 10:09 am… you will be 14… And we’re going to figure this out, you and me… You’re going to figure out how to grow up… And I’m going to figure out how to parent you as you do… we will mess up… I will make mistakes… so will you… I’m going to try to hug you in public… your going to make inappropriate jokes… we are going to forgive each other… we are going to survives this… because… My gosh, I love you in this moment.

Happy Birthday Angel Boy.

 

 

ThemeSong Thursday…. Be okay today

A moment of clarity… in the middle of the busiest week of the summer… in the middle of everyone’s birthdays… in the midst of work… the flu… colds… eye infections.. pneumonia… ear infections… and the bloody noses that have taken up residence in our home… Today it came… a moment of clarity… and here is the themesong of the day… and I know that maybe I will be okay…

 

… He wears the pants… literally

Mr. Amazing:  I know who wears the pants in this house

me:  It is you!

Mr. Amazing: me?

me:  Unless it comes to activity planning

Mr. Amazing: or dinner

me:  You wear the pants

Mr. Amazing:  or cleaning

or…

 me:  Well… you bring home the bacon?

Mr. Amazing:  wait, what am I in charge of?

me:  I fry it up in a pan? and never ever let you forget your a man… Like that… Feminists everywhere are combusting spontaneously and they dont know why

Mr. Amazing:  never ever let me forget I’m a man? really? you just typed that?

 me:  Its a song!

Mr. Amazing:  how do you remind me that I’m a man, exactly?

me:  The song said it!

Mr. Amazing:  hold up

me:  No no no… you hold up!

Mr. Amazing:  so you are quoting lyrics from a song

me:  You made me type that… I blame you

Mr. Amazing:  but not with intentions of meaning what you are typing.

 me:  that whole pants in the family bull shit

Mr. Amazing: lol you are just upset because everyone thinks you run this house

me:  I am actually! Because I don’t! You all do, and I just help you do it right ROTFLMAO!

Mr. Amazing: I could disappear for a year and people would barely notice I was gone

me:  Liar! You know that isnt true

Mr. Amazing: the dishes would be done, the house would be spotless

you could have a robot leave paper towels in random locations

and leave clothes in the bathrooms

and watch TV

 me:  I totally would never buy that robot, Just sayin

Mr. Amazing:  they may notice the lack of paper and mess

me:  This is all on you… You are as big of a contributor as you choose to be

Mr. Amazing: from now on, only I wear that pants

(Click on image for a better look)

dresses

 me:  I AM SOOOO BLOGGING THAT! OMG!

Kicking in the general direction :)

G-Chat

Mr. Amazing: … so get this… I walk over to a Co-Workers’ desk this morning and lean against the wall and start talking to him, I realize he looks distracted, won’t look me in the face… etc… weird… so as I am walking away, I realize that my zipper is all the way down, like scary low… and I am like … OMG! run to the bathroom and then come back to tell you… yeah… okay, and you realize that this is the guy that I told earlier in the year, that BFGoodrich invented the zipper  yeah…

me:  ROTFLMAO!

Mr. Amazing:  he invented the zipper Kerry

me:  I totally blogged that! (TRUST ME People… you want to read that)

Mr. Amazing:  good thing

me:  People loved it

Mr. Amazing:  yeah, I used to make you laugh all the time with my crazy antics, now that you know me better

it just causes shame

 me:  No shame!

Mr. Amazing:  Are you with him?

you look down

you are like… no

I mean maybe

I mean no

 me:  LMAO! never

Mr. Amazing:  who?

that guy with the scraggly beard and stains on him

Is that your husband?

no….

are you sure….

yeah….

 me:  Whatever, I think you are adorable.

Mr. Amazing:  Yeah, that’s your husband

oh… <fake laugh>

yeah… that’s him

<fake laugh>

looking down

shame

 me:  Quit it… you know that isn’t true

Mr. Amazing:  ROFL isn’t it? you are at the movie theater

 me:  ROTFLMAO!

Mr. Amazing:  and there is this guy talking through the movie with stains all over himself and you are thinking, wow… he is amazing

me:  Yes, yes I do

Mr. Amazing:  ROFLMAO uh huh

 me:  Have you met me?

Mr. Amazing:  nope, never met you, how do you do

me:  Have I ever acted in public like I think you are anything less than wonderful?

Mr. Amazing:  my name is Dorkface… yes you have “acted” like I am wonderful, for which I am eternally thankful ROFL

 me:  LOL! The only time I acted weird with you out in public, is the one time we ran into a girl from work while we were dating… and she was all “I’ve heard so much about you” and I was all OMG! She is going to tell him how I tell all the girls at work how amazing he is in the sack! and I kicked her

Mr. Amazing:  you kicked her??!!! seriously??

me:  You don’t remember?

Mr. Amazing:  OMG, that was weird

me:  ROTFL!

Mr. Amazing:   no, I don’t remember you kicking her, I remember her being awkward and running away

me:  I kicked in her general direction

Mr. Amazing:  now I know why

 me:  LMAO!

goodrich

Ode to Freddy …

Hey… Sometimes you just have to go with it… this not sleeping thing… This isn’t my first Krueger reference … and I am sure it won’t be my last.

I love him! Freddy Krueger may be the best dreamed up character out there… He doesn’t amble around slowly with a dumb mask…  and he’s not a made up monster or a possessed animal or a crazy girl who kills puppies…  He is a guy who can kill people in their dreams…. Everyone sleeps and dreams! He is an equal opportunity slasher!

What is great about Freddy is the thin line between dreams and reality… Freddy may be in their dreams but he can kill them in real life. What a badass!

This also happens to be Johnny Depp’s very first movie (Who I am also enamored with… and Mario… don’t even get me started on my “trapped in a love triangle” with him and Luigi drama). He plays Nancy’s boyfriend and just doesn’t take this whole not sleeping thing as seriously as Nancy. One of the most famous scenes is his death scene and I must say it is pretty awesome although…there does seem to be a little too much blood for one little adorable young Johnny Depp… I am pretty sure that blood is rum… and that is why it’s always gone. (What… I haven’t slept well)

I also enjoy the scene where Nancy’s mother takes her to the sleep clinic to figure out what’s wrong. They watch her on the monitor and once she goes into REM her heart rate is off the charts. She begins wildly thrashing and her mother and the doctor rush in. Nancy’s hair has turned white and she’s clutching Freddy’s hat in her hand… A hat! that even has the name Fred Krueger sewn into it… I wonder if he does his own sewing? Anyways, later, Nancy’s mom brings her down to the basement where she takes a small bundle out of the furnace. She tells Nancy about how a while back there was a child murderer named Fred Krueger who used to take his victims to an old boiler room and kill them. He managed to kill about 20 kids before the parents of the community became outraged and decided to burn him alive in boiler room. Lucky for Nancy’s mom, she got to keep his knife fingers, which she believes is proof that he can’t come back and kill Nancy… But of course he can… And also why would you ever keep a child murderers knife fingers? Sick.

Freddy-Krueger-evil-24375590-500-375

He’s witty and mean, and has such a gross face that he doesn’t need a scary mask. He also likes to wear stripes and a stylish hat. What’s not to love?