It is hard for me to talk about my teeth… My family has really awful teeth… a dentist once told me that it was because we didn’t have the soft mushy stuff inside of them? another told me it was because we didn’t have enamel… I don’t know which is true… neither or both? I do know that medical care… or dental care growing up was scarce… infact I didn’t see my first dentist until I was 13 and the caseworker forced my mom to take me… I hadn’t been taught any kind of dental care… and well… my teeth were gross… Fast-forward to 19 and someone taught my how to take care of my teeth… and i began to do so religiously at that point (you’re wondering why this story in the middle of a pandemic? i’m getting there) But then another oddity about me is that i am of the 2 percent that Novocaine doesn’t work on and have even been kicked out of a dentist office for punching the dentist in the face who didn’t believe me… now add to the fact that for other reasons… I DO NOT like to be pinned down… I do not like people in my face… and I do not like to be told my feelings of pain are not real… and the Dentist is my LEAST favorite activity… but here I am 46… still with my own teeth… Last year when I was running a high fever I awoke one day to all of my teeth grey (look i don’t know if i have blogged that before… and I have too much to say to go back and look right now) Grey…. like dead… and they hurt… not one… like all… and two days later… they were whitish again… kinda… LUPUS. Since then they have weakened and slowly crumbled like stone… but i’ve been so careful… and so embarrassed about them as holes and spaces have started to appear…. this morning i broke one … on bread… and I just cant even… I do not heal guys… like it takes 90 days for a bruise from a blood draw to go away…. and even if I could go to a dentist right now… I am not sure what I can have done. I’ve tried so hard… Sooo I am blogging this… to try and turn it over and let it go. What else can I do… So me and my hick mouth are gonna just stay home still.