… It Starts with us

You… yeah you… sitting there not thinking you can do anything… or wondering how you can make a difference… or feeling alone.. or setting goals for yourself.. or trying to find a way to cling to your humanity in what seems a very unhumane world… There is a lot you can do… But not a lot more simple that this… I do this… I do this every week… It is how I get through the week… It is how I rise above everything else and stay positive… Trust me.

 … It Starts with Us

This was our moment

The Traveling Red Dress… A Story… Within a Story… With in a Story

I can’t read this post without tearing up a little each time… Watched the TRD community page for weeks on Facebook… peeked at others Red dress moments… shopped for dresses online… as if I would ever really purchase one… Shared the story with every female friend of mine that I ever thought could use a Red Dress moment… and then one day… This (through a series of events) was sent to me … And I knew my weeks of lurking were over… because honestly, I know everyone feels this way… But I am special…  She inspires me to believe that I can do anything…  more than a box of wine… or 6 vanilla soy lattes… or a good rap session on the freeway commuting into the office… . So I wouldn’t let myself chicken out of… ‘cause I just want to be like The Bloggess that much! So I tried it on

Headless Red Dress

It Fit! Next, I made the arrangements with my soul sister, and set the date and time… and informed her she too would be wearing the dress… Well mostly…#1 because she needs a red dress moment, and doesn’t know it and  even more to the point #2 because then I have equal amounts of pictures of her in said ball gown… should she ever feel the need to show them to anyone. That’s just what kind of friends we are. 

I was a little nervous (Nervous means I didn’t sleep for two days and was irrationally crying a little each time I scaled laundry mountain… since I had failed to properly do laundry  since I found out the dress was coming.. and the dishes … and cooking… The local Indian Restaurant  which I highly recommend knows my voice and calls me by name when I call for take-out) But I hopped in the shower Sunday morning without a care in the world… and exited the shower a hysterical mess…. drying off my shoulders I took a good look at the war wounds there… The claw like stretch marks… the vertical evenly spaced scars on top of them… then let my eyes travel over the rest of me…  They are everywhere… things that I hate… a lump.. a fold.. a wrinkle.. a scar… a bruise.. a freckle… pulled out a unwanted hair and completely melted down… I made my way from the bathroom to my bedroom unseen and climbed back into bed… water drops changing the color of my lavender sheets to a dark purple…. And sobbed … I wish I could tell you I forced myself up and into my car… But I didn’t… I reached for my phone and text said soul sister that perhaps we should catch up on sleep instead… that I didn’t think I felt too well…. And her response was this… and I quote “NO! I have been looking forward to it all week! GET over here NOW!”… so I threw back on my pajamas… grabbed all my makeup…yet somehow no bra…. attempted to get out of the house without alerting smallest child and Mr. Amazing to the streams of tears and shaking hands…. I tried to get out, but Mr. Amazing can spot me from a mile away… I hoarsely ask him to load the gown in my car for me… Which he responds “of course” and I grab the stunningly beautiful Red Pashmina he had overnighted to the house for the occasion… Knowing this moment would be likely… Seeing as the dress was strapless… and he tells me it will be okay.. that he loves me so so so much (he really says so three times, god I love him)…. and that I don’t have to show them to anyone if I don’t like them.. and he finds my camera for me… my special camera that means so much … it reminds me of my grandpa… and he texts me before I can arrive at the house around the corner to make sure I am okay… surprisingly,  I was.

We primped and prepped and talked about our kids… We had grown up together.. and so had our kids… I wonder if our kids’ kids will… wouldn’t that be amazing? I bet it totally happens… And then magic took place… We each took a turn in this Red dress… giggled and laughed and complemented each other.. posed… and might’ve jumped on the bed… took a million pictures… pretended to drink straight from a bottle with the label turned so you couldn’t see it was apple cider instead of whiskey… Danced… folded laundry…

Red Dress Collage

I then pulled my grey man hoodie over this amazingly magical gown.. and ran through the snowy march afternoon to my car with bare feet and drove back around the corner so that smallest child… who I have convinced I am allergic to dresses (also the color pink, glitter, lace, princesses, Barbies,  Lalaloopsies …the list is added to frequently) see me in the dress… (Mr. Amazing said wow!)  She loved it! And wanted it to be hers… but she is five… and has no concept of size and proportions… It would never fit her… She wanted to have a tea party… and I quickly agreed… She went and tossed on a  “Tiana” dress up gown.. and I put on pajamas…with a matching tiara.

I know I don’t have to share these… But I’m not coming this far without showing them off… Magic!

 

Story #2

So, my BFF calls me one day. Yes, I am almost 40 years old. Yes, I said BFF. She tells me about this red dress that we are going to take turns wearing. We are going to get together and do our hair and make-up and act like girls. Notice I didn’t say ask? She knows the only thing I will say “NO!” to her for is setting me up on a blind date. *That’s a different blog*

After expressing to my tweenage daughter that I feel like I had turned into a fat frumpy old mom and her response was, “Feel?” … I knew I needed this. Work, kids, men and life have a way of consuming a woman and I had let it! Text to catch up on sleep? Hell no!! I bought make-up for this!!

For as long as she and I have known each other, we had never done anything like this before. We are not girly girls, hoodies and jeans please! There were no kids, no men, we turned up the radio and giggled as we put on our make-up and curled our hair. I wore the dress first. I absolutely hate my flabby arms, but I didn’t care in the magic dress! It transformed me! I tried to take serious pictures, but if you were to see the ones I was smiling in, it was actually an evil laugh. She was screaming at me because I was having too much fun taking my own pictures with the camera on my phone!

Then it was her turn. She was beautiful! She looked like Snow White with her black hair and bright red dress!

She wanted to take lighthearted funny pictures, not serious ones like I did. Then I leave her alone with my phone and she takes pictures of herself just like she screamed at me for!! They were AMAZING! There is something about taking your own picture that captures what no one else can!

~The Soul Sister