Attitude of Gratitude

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Attitude-of-Gratitude

Grandsons & Grandpa. 

Real Friends – mine are real & mine rock!

Acts of kindness. “Kindness is my religion” Dalai Lama

Three beautiful children I call my own. (Even if I have to share them)

Iced Coffee – Not just because it started with an I either.

Time, coffee time, dinnertime, family time, extra time, borrowed time.

Unusual circumstances- This is how I met Mr. Amazing, I love him so much!

Dude, this is harder than I thought it would be when I started this.

Everyone reading this blog! TADA! I Fucking Did it!

 

 

A reader lives a thousand lives….

I love to read… I love several genres of Novels… The prompt is to list 8 books that I believe everyone should read in their lifetime

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Here we go- in no particular order…

Harry Potter- by J.K. Rowling; I am going to cheat a little…I am not going to use up my 8 books by mentioning all 7 books. But you should read all 7. I love them, I cannot imagine a world without the magic that happened around that lovely book series.

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan – By Lisa See; I read this recently, I have always had a fascination with the Chinese traditions and philosophies around women. If this is something that you read about (And are thankful we are not being raised this way(Unless you are… then I’m sorry)) I also recommend the beloved Amy Tan books as well as EVERYTHING by Anchee Min, I intend to read more Lisa See books and will keep you posted on how I feel about them.

The Night Circus – By Erin Morgenstern; I had never read a book like this! It was so different, and bizarre, and full of mystery that never really answered itself. I loved the characters, I love the scenes, I just loved this book. I would like to put other books here because that seems to be what I am doing… but this really is such a stand alone book, It is so Unique, short of the great “Something Wicked This Way Comes” nothing even could be paired with this book (which the only thing these books have in common is a circus)… Oh! Read some Ray Bradbury… just because.

The Book Thief- By Markus Zusak; I am sure this will make several peoples lists as it is very much talked about right now… and with good reason, It was beautifully and uniquely written… I applaud the author for finding a beautiful way to tell such a horrible story… That being said other books in the genre that everyone should have read by now are of course- Anne Frank, To Kill a Mocking Bird, Black Boy and Escape from Camp 14. Be educated.

ROOM – By Emma Donoghue; There is kind of a theme to my book selections, I am fascinated with different types of writing styles, I like to read books that are written so differently that they don’t remind you of anything else… I Loved this book for that reason only, But that being said, I often read survivors books – Elizabeth Smart, Jaycee Dugard ect. I do believe there is something (beyond the horror) of these that encourages me and takes away some of the power from these monsters…. I also believe they wrote their story for a reason… and it deserves to be read as a tribute to their strength. Speaking of Great Survivors, another one is Elephant Girl by Jane Devin. Beautifully Written. Also, The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls.

The Hunger Game Series – By Suzanne Collins; I cringe to mention this because it already get so much press, but they are FANTASTIC- and if this is the kind of book appeals to you, for the loved of god read The Host, and the Mortal Instruments series, also  read Divergent, Insurgent and Allegient, as well as Matched, Crossed, Reached, as well as the Uglies and the Pretties, as well as Most things by Amanda Hockings (Other than the vampire ones… unless you really liked twilight… which I didn’t and you will notice is not listed here)

Circle of Friends- By: Maeve Binchy – I Love love her books in general, I loved the Lilac Bus, Tara Road and The Glass Lake… There are more, but you get the idea… These are what I read when I just want to feel… not relate… just feel. Her descriptions of different country sides over the EU is beautiful as well… Just beautiful.

Crank- By Ellen Hopkins – also followed by Glass… and there are many more… If you have a teenager… you should read these. Just my personal opinion. Plus the first thing you will notice about them is that they are written in a different manner once again, than anything I have ever read.

Books

 

I would LOVE LOVE LOVE it if you all would leave me a comment with your list, or suggestions, as I am also on the prowl for my next life.

For better or for Worse… I am

mama kats

Hi, my name is ______ and I am a _______.

Hi… My name is Kerry… and I am a Human Being.

… I wanted to put so many other things in that spot… I ran through every positive thing about myself I could put in there… and mentally these were quickly replaced with every vice I have put into name calling form as well… I am my own best friend… and my own worst enemy all wrapped up in one… I motivate myself and set goals… I am a driven individual… I also tear myself down… tell myself I am not capable of reaching dreams… I am a Self Sabotager… I am a friend… I thought of my closest friends and how much they mean to me… and how much I love them… and want to be there for them… and I am an unreliable friend… who oftens stands people up… overbooks herself… and is guilty of only calling when I need help… I am a wife… I am a nag… I am a confidant… I am an instigator… for better or for worse… I will judge you… and I will tell you… I guess that is just part of the package deal…. I am the only person I know that can beat herself up for beating herself up… I am a Mom…  the good and the bad… and I love fiercely! I am a self harmer…. albeit in remission… also an addict… also not in practice… I am a woman… but my boobs are not that great… just say’n

I am a human being… for better or worse… and I will forgive myself a thousand mistakes a day… and borrow from the next if I am having a really rough go at it.

 

Mom

 

This is Halloween!

mama kats

If you have been reading this blog long… or even once… it will not surprise you to discover that my mind …. albeit unique… it kind of warped… It is a beautiful thing. One symptom of said mind is what I like to refer to as a Swiss Cheese Memory… I call it this because it has so many holes. I was reading through the writers prompts this week and finding myself a little discouraged… it is Halloween Time! The prompt I wanted so badly to write about is “Who had the good candy? Share what Halloween was like for you as a child.” For two days I have looked at the prompt… waiting for inspiration to strike… as I do every week… and slowly I have come to realize something I never noticed before.
I do not remember a single Halloween in my childhood. At first this upset me… like I was missing something fantastic… or burying some deep dark secret… but truth be told… like most of my childhood… it probably was just not very memorable. I have snippets of thoughts around those holidays … I remember sitting on a cold stone entry way carving pumpkins… vaguely… also a bumblebee costume… although if it were worn by myself or a sibling I couldnt tell you… and then I remember 3 homes I visited (Most likely every year) and TADA! I have a post!

The Evans Home – the mother always dressed as a witch! full on green faced… pointy nosed and hatted… making her witches brew in her front yard… with what I recognize now as an adult to be dry ice and hot chocolate.

The Rasmussen Home – this mother would answer the door… sweet as could be… in her pretty witch costume… give us our candy and as we would scamper from their porch she would release a cackle that would make my hair stand on end as I attempted to jump out of my skin.

Last but not least… the gorilla… through our neighborhood ran a grown man dressed in a gorilla suit terrifying the older kids trick or treating… I don’t know how I know it was our neighborhood pediatrician… but I remember it is… and I loved the man. Dearly.

This post leaves a sour taste in my mouth … simply for the lack of anything better to post… So this is where being me rocks… it does really… and let me tell you about the my smalls Halloweens… which I remember vividly… and hope they do as well.

Costumes Galore… Pumpkin Carving… Roasted Seeds… a blend of home made and store bought costumes… Halloween parties thrown for Tall child… trick or treating for small… We have trick or treated with the same family for as long as I can remember… and in the neighborhood is the house decorated to the extreme… with scary clowns… and some guy in an electric chair… The house that one year… I kid you not… grilled pancakes in their driveway and passed them out nice and warm… and they were loved… and bizarre. The house with homemade root-beer at the end of their homemade spook alley made of refrigerator boxes and lights.

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Now that is Halloween!!

A day in the life…

mama kats Take a picture every hour and show us what a day in your life is like.

I haven’t been super bloggy like lately…… I’ve been having a rough go at things… I read back through my blog to Septembers past… and realize I am in the same place… that I always survive… that I always blog again… even though in this place it seems completely impossible to imagine surviving the next 48 hours…  I know I will… What is going on.. is it literally just drowning in memories? Is it the time of year. the change of seasons? is it all in my head? I do not really know where it comes from, if it is real or not… It is real enough feeling… I imagine being somewhere where I can shut down all my senses, all the noises, all light and touch… I imagine my brain not being able to think… … Just for a day… It is like walking through tar… if I stop walking it will settle and firm up…So I don’t… and just like this dark place was entered with no real reason… I will walk into the lighter place again… and my legs will be less heavy… and I will become more engaged in my surroundings again… I will not make any life changing decisions in this dark place… and I will not bring others to it with me…. It is going to be okay… It is always going to be okay…and this prompt sounded fun… So regardless of my feelings I keep moving… Here is what my day looks like today…

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I woke up… showered… got dressed… (Saved your life and didn’t take a picture that hour)… and got out the door. (7 am)

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Took my most adorable creeper to school…

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Made my 30 minute commute as the sun beamed its way through the clouds, and didn’t crash into the idiots taking pictures of the massive rainbow that made its debut in the morning traffic. (Take note: No Rainbow Picture!)

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 Finally arrived here where I will spend the next 9 hours of the day…. (8 am)

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Imagine this on repeat until 5 pm… Save me the trouble of reposting (I love my job, and I am grateful for it)

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Mid-day jaunt through the warehouse to search for something that the warehouse manager & his adorable British accent are too busy to find…. 20 minutes of walking a creepy dark warehouse with thousands upon thousands of boxes…. then finding it under his desk… (FTW… WOOT!) (1 pm)

counter Nearing the 5 o’clock hour… I allow myself to watch the Disneyland count down… for a moment… or ten. (4 pm)

Finally… Made the drive home… decided to bag the whole preparing of food for the day…. (6 pm) Chinese it is!

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Here goes the night time routine…. Music Practice… Voice, Viola and Piano…

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Next is a shower (7 pm)

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This is the look Mr. Amazing gives me when I tell him I need his Mac to finish up my blog… because I have to blog each hour or I will forget… bahaha damn he is cute (8 pm)

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Feeding of the beasties!!! OMG we are almost there!!! (9 pm)

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Finally… My Sanctuary… Back in bed… See… I didn’t think I could do it… but not only did I do it… I did it with pictures!

Sweet Dreams!!! GoodNight!!! (10 pm)

 

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Cause baby… you’re a firework

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In our state the 24th of July is celebrated at the same intensity as the 4th of July… While I don’t really care so much about this local holiday…. Fireworks!!!

 

Coffee…. Coffee Coffee…. Coffee Coffee Coffee

mama kats                        “Write a post inspired by the word: Coffee”

The biggest compliment in my world that I can give is “I love you more than coffee” … Because to know me… is to know my obsession with coffee…. I love iced in the summer… hot in the winter and fall… Vanilla flavoring… Hazelnut…. dark roast… free trade …. organic… oh my god… I totally typed orgasmic instead of organic right there…. it might be a little too close to the truth for my comfort…. Mmmmm Coffee

I drink it downtown… mom and pop shops… even the evil Starbucks… I buy my beans from a local roaster… I grind them at home… All good things come with coffee:  Sunday Mornings are my favorite… Sunday Morning on CBS… coffee in my over-sized Winnie the pooh cup… Wednesday Night Lessons… dropping small child off at piano and driving through with Mr. Amazing for something warm and caffeinated (He is a chai guy) … I remember getting through many college years solely on coffee…. Even Folgers coffee… from my friends pot… with coffee mate creamer… and fake sugar is like a comforting hug from the safest place on earth….

Coffee scented candles, Chocolate covered coffee beans, coffee flavored toffee…. I love it!

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You think I am a little crazy… admit it… obsessed even… but I totally didn’t write this poem about coffee…

 

An Ode To Coffee

By Ray DavidsonSleep is for the weak, someone I know once said,
I want to feel alive and not just temporarily dead,Tis’ better to be conscious, than to sleep away our life,
Besides it gives us more time to deal with all our strife.Oh the nay sayers will say, you are crazy to be like that,
Who wants to give up that bed to put on their coat and hat?To go off to work and play and start another grueling day,
Mister you are really crazy, to be thinking like that way.But I have a secret weapon to fight away those dreams,
These things can pack a whallop, these special little beans.

They give me rise to chaos and funny nonsense like this,
To write such goofy things and make me feel this bliss,

That I get from drinking coffee, it has me to spread it’s voice,
Coffee, the breakfast of champions, caffeine the drug of choice.

So sleep away your cares, you’re all a bunch of lazies!
I’ve got to go work and deal with all those bunch of crazies.

So goodbye to you in slumber when everyone is at that brink.
There’ll be no sleep for this guy, well, maybe just a wink.