In our state the 24th of July is celebrated at the same intensity as the 4th of July… While I don’t really care so much about this local holiday…. Fireworks!!!
Jul
24
2013
smiffbib
socially acceptable f@#% off!
Oddities
Uhhhh Just because Im like that
Jul
23
2013
Coffee…. Coffee Coffee…. Coffee Coffee Coffee
“Write a post inspired by the word: Coffee”
The biggest compliment in my world that I can give is “I love you more than coffee” … Because to know me… is to know my obsession with coffee…. I love iced in the summer… hot in the winter and fall… Vanilla flavoring… Hazelnut…. dark roast… free trade …. organic… oh my god… I totally typed orgasmic instead of organic right there…. it might be a little too close to the truth for my comfort…. Mmmmm Coffee
I drink it downtown… mom and pop shops… even the evil Starbucks… I buy my beans from a local roaster… I grind them at home… All good things come with coffee: Sunday Mornings are my favorite… Sunday Morning on CBS… coffee in my over-sized Winnie the pooh cup… Wednesday Night Lessons… dropping small child off at piano and driving through with Mr. Amazing for something warm and caffeinated (He is a chai guy) … I remember getting through many college years solely on coffee…. Even Folgers coffee… from my friends pot… with coffee mate creamer… and fake sugar is like a comforting hug from the safest place on earth….
Coffee scented candles, Chocolate covered coffee beans, coffee flavored toffee…. I love it!
You think I am a little crazy… admit it… obsessed even… but I totally didn’t write this poem about coffee…
An Ode To Coffee
By Ray DavidsonSleep is for the weak, someone I know once said,
I want to feel alive and not just temporarily dead,Tis’ better to be conscious, than to sleep away our life,
Besides it gives us more time to deal with all our strife.Oh the nay sayers will say, you are crazy to be like that,
Who wants to give up that bed to put on their coat and hat?To go off to work and play and start another grueling day,
Mister you are really crazy, to be thinking like that way.But I have a secret weapon to fight away those dreams,
These things can pack a whallop, these special little beans.
I want to feel alive and not just temporarily dead,Tis’ better to be conscious, than to sleep away our life,
Besides it gives us more time to deal with all our strife.Oh the nay sayers will say, you are crazy to be like that,
Who wants to give up that bed to put on their coat and hat?To go off to work and play and start another grueling day,
Mister you are really crazy, to be thinking like that way.But I have a secret weapon to fight away those dreams,
These things can pack a whallop, these special little beans.
They give me rise to chaos and funny nonsense like this,
To write such goofy things and make me feel this bliss,
That I get from drinking coffee, it has me to spread it’s voice,
Coffee, the breakfast of champions, caffeine the drug of choice.
So sleep away your cares, you’re all a bunch of lazies!
I’ve got to go work and deal with all those bunch of crazies.
So goodbye to you in slumber when everyone is at that brink.
There’ll be no sleep for this guy, well, maybe just a wink.
Jul
19
2013
Giant Gummy Say What??
Mr Amazing:
Mr Amazing: This just doesn’t look right – looks like you could buy it at one of those “slumber parties”
Me: UMM OMG OMG!!! You bought me that giant gummy coke right? RIGHT?
Mr Amazing: Nope, did you read my comment on the gummy worm?
Me: I read it… But I got sidetracked by the thought of that coke bottle!
Mr Amazing:
Me: Would you focus! GIANT GUMMY COKE BOTTLE!
((Gross on the giant gummy worm btw.))
May
29
2013
Internet… Meet my paint room
The floor is covered with paint supplies and pillows
Unfinished projects and blank canvas lean against the wall
My boo boxes are stored in here
Often bursting at the seams with candles and incense and writings
Finished projects hung on the wall (Can you see my angels in there?)
These are textured paintings with granite and clear acrylic… it is hard to see in the picture I suppose… they are made to be touched.
With my dog in the doorway and my cat at my side (only because that’s where the pillows are!)
I try some new ideas.. combining my writing with my paints…. very rough start
This one is working a bit better
I spend the least amount of time in this room … yet it is my favorite… more time is spent in the kitchen… the smalls rooms … tucked safely in a warm comforter with a book on my bed … but it is my secret escape… my guilty pleasure… and when I do finally get the chance to be in there… it is savored that much more.
May
24
2013
… He wears the pants… literally
Mr. Amazing: I know who wears the pants in this house
me: It is you!
Mr. Amazing: me?
me: Unless it comes to activity planning
Mr. Amazing: or dinner
me: You wear the pants
Mr. Amazing: or cleaning
or…
me: Well… you bring home the bacon?
Mr. Amazing: wait, what am I in charge of?
me: I fry it up in a pan? and never ever let you forget your a man… Like that… Feminists everywhere are combusting spontaneously and they dont know why
Mr. Amazing: never ever let me forget I’m a man? really? you just typed that?
me: Its a song!
Mr. Amazing: how do you remind me that I’m a man, exactly?
me: The song said it!
Mr. Amazing: hold up
me: No no no… you hold up!
Mr. Amazing: so you are quoting lyrics from a song
me: You made me type that… I blame you
Mr. Amazing: but not with intentions of meaning what you are typing.
me: that whole pants in the family bull shit
Mr. Amazing: lol you are just upset because everyone thinks you run this house
me: I am actually! Because I don’t! You all do, and I just help you do it right ROTFLMAO!
Mr. Amazing: I could disappear for a year and people would barely notice I was gone
me: Liar! You know that isnt true
Mr. Amazing: the dishes would be done, the house would be spotless
you could have a robot leave paper towels in random locations
and leave clothes in the bathrooms
and watch TV
me: I totally would never buy that robot, Just sayin
Mr. Amazing: they may notice the lack of paper and mess
me: This is all on you… You are as big of a contributor as you choose to be
Mr. Amazing: from now on, only I wear that pants
(Click on image for a better look)
me: I AM SOOOO BLOGGING THAT! OMG!
Apr
30
2013
Smiffbib Sangria… Seriously
Prompt: Refreshments anyone? Prepare a drink for us and share the recipe!
Simple Sangria… Wow… This is the most random post ever!
Okay… So I don’t cook… but I sure love to eat!
(I totally cook … sometimes… just so you know)
Well… I am no bartender… But I sure love wine!
Smiffbib Sangria … Because this whole recipe resonates with the I don’t care attitude – 1 bottle of white wine (I love THIS one! 3 cans of Fresca, add sliced fruit (peaches, strawberries, grapes, etc whatever is left over from the kids lunch works for me!! HA!)
Sip it… Fill a tumbler… bathe in it… whichever your style …
What! that wasn’t what you were expecting out of me?? Not enough Smiffbib in the Sangria??? Here! Visit my drunk tweet post… because… well… Drunk Tweets!
Apr
26
2013
Kicking in the general direction :)
G-Chat
Mr. Amazing: … so get this… I walk over to a Co-Workers’ desk this morning and lean against the wall and start talking to him, I realize he looks distracted, won’t look me in the face… etc… weird… so as I am walking away, I realize that my zipper is all the way down, like scary low… and I am like … OMG! run to the bathroom and then come back to tell you… yeah… okay, and you realize that this is the guy that I told earlier in the year, that BFGoodrich invented the zipper yeah…
me: ROTFLMAO!
Mr. Amazing: he invented the zipper Kerry
me: I totally blogged that! (TRUST ME People… you want to read that)
Mr. Amazing: good thing
me: People loved it
Mr. Amazing: yeah, I used to make you laugh all the time with my crazy antics, now that you know me better
it just causes shame
me: No shame!
Mr. Amazing: Are you with him?
you look down
you are like… no
I mean maybe
I mean no
me: LMAO! never
Mr. Amazing: who?
that guy with the scraggly beard and stains on him
Is that your husband?
no….
are you sure….
yeah….
me: Whatever, I think you are adorable.
Mr. Amazing: Yeah, that’s your husband
oh… <fake laugh>
yeah… that’s him
<fake laugh>
looking down
shame
me: Quit it… you know that isn’t true
Mr. Amazing: ROFL isn’t it? you are at the movie theater
me: ROTFLMAO!
Mr. Amazing: and there is this guy talking through the movie with stains all over himself and you are thinking, wow… he is amazing
me: Yes, yes I do
Mr. Amazing: ROFLMAO uh huh
me: Have you met me?
Mr. Amazing: nope, never met you, how do you do
me: Have I ever acted in public like I think you are anything less than wonderful?
Mr. Amazing: my name is Dorkface… yes you have “acted” like I am wonderful, for which I am eternally thankful ROFL
me: LOL! The only time I acted weird with you out in public, is the one time we ran into a girl from work while we were dating… and she was all “I’ve heard so much about you” and I was all OMG! She is going to tell him how I tell all the girls at work how amazing he is in the sack! and I kicked her
Mr. Amazing: you kicked her??!!! seriously??
me: You don’t remember?
Mr. Amazing: OMG, that was weird
me: ROTFL!
Mr. Amazing: no, I don’t remember you kicking her, I remember her being awkward and running away
me: I kicked in her general direction
Mr. Amazing: now I know why
me: LMAO!
Apr
24
2013
… Time for change…
Apr
23
2013
Ode to Freddy …
Hey… Sometimes you just have to go with it… this not sleeping thing… This isn’t my first Krueger reference … and I am sure it won’t be my last.
I love him! Freddy Krueger may be the best dreamed up character out there… He doesn’t amble around slowly with a dumb mask… and he’s not a made up monster or a possessed animal or a crazy girl who kills puppies… He is a guy who can kill people in their dreams…. Everyone sleeps and dreams! He is an equal opportunity slasher!
What is great about Freddy is the thin line between dreams and reality… Freddy may be in their dreams but he can kill them in real life. What a badass!
This also happens to be Johnny Depp’s very first movie (Who I am also enamored with… and Mario… don’t even get me started on my “trapped in a love triangle” with him and Luigi drama). He plays Nancy’s boyfriend and just doesn’t take this whole not sleeping thing as seriously as Nancy. One of the most famous scenes is his death scene and I must say it is pretty awesome although…there does seem to be a little too much blood for one little adorable young Johnny Depp… I am pretty sure that blood is rum… and that is why it’s always gone. (What… I haven’t slept well)
I also enjoy the scene where Nancy’s mother takes her to the sleep clinic to figure out what’s wrong. They watch her on the monitor and once she goes into REM her heart rate is off the charts. She begins wildly thrashing and her mother and the doctor rush in. Nancy’s hair has turned white and she’s clutching Freddy’s hat in her hand… A hat! that even has the name Fred Krueger sewn into it… I wonder if he does his own sewing? Anyways, later, Nancy’s mom brings her down to the basement where she takes a small bundle out of the furnace. She tells Nancy about how a while back there was a child murderer named Fred Krueger who used to take his victims to an old boiler room and kill them. He managed to kill about 20 kids before the parents of the community became outraged and decided to burn him alive in boiler room. Lucky for Nancy’s mom, she got to keep his knife fingers, which she believes is proof that he can’t come back and kill Nancy… But of course he can… And also why would you ever keep a child murderers knife fingers? Sick.
He’s witty and mean, and has such a gross face that he doesn’t need a scary mask. He also likes to wear stripes and a stylish hat. What’s not to love?
Apr
09
2013
