… I have been plugging along for weeks… Normal stresses… End of the school year projects… concerts… quick trip to the lake… work… laundry… work… dishes… work… lessons… work… sweeping up the pile of dog hair from the floors that resembles a chinchilla… sleep overs… fathers day preparation… working extra hours over the weekend… and it hits… with no warning from one day to the next… I was a functioning member of society yesterday… juggling all of the above … with a smile… today I woke up… wanting to run away… move where no one knows me… and just start over completely… my head hurts… my eyes hurt… my body hurts…. I tear up almost every time some makes eye contact… or uses a tone of voice that my emotional state doesn’t deem as an  appropriate reaction… I couldn’t sleep… I held my body so tensely that soon my toes began cramping… then my feet… muscles across the top and bottoms twist in painful contortion like spasms… moving up to my calves until I spent most of the night at the foot of the bed stretching them… and trying to work the knots out…. I want to sleep… I want to crawl in bed and stare at the white wall until I am completely disconnected from my body and mind… zoned out beyond reach… I want a break … I am breaking… just twelve hours later… twelve hours since yesterday when I was laughing and greeting people with confidence…. There isn’t enough caffeine in the world to make me feel like I have the energy to make it through this day… it feels that way… but somehow I just keep making the motions…