I’m cheating again this week… I might have a problem with it honestly… So mamakats writers prompts came out a day early… and my cell phone chimed as the email came to my gmail account as I was spending my Sunday afternoon in my paint room… I stopped and with paint covered fingers navigated the touch screen to open it and read the prompts… The prompts this week were take from the “One Word” resolutions of last week… What a GREAT idea!! Two of the words jumped off the page from the list of 5 ( here are all five just because it did inspire so many blog ideas)
1.) Explore 2.) Release 3.) Trust 4.) Acceptance 5.) Creativity
I experience release through creativity…
I have an issue… okay several, but if you have read this blog a while the theme around most of it is in appropriately channeled anxiety…
So every other Sunday morning (the Sunday morning small child is at his fathers)
I generally wake up on the wrong side of the bed… I cry at the drop of a hat… I get very nit picky.. and panicky about housework (which then triggers poor Mr. Amazing’s anxiety)
Its regular party…
But we recognize it.. and I have all the tools to deal with it… even though sometimes I forget I can actually use these tools…
First- I took a warm shower… took the time to do the girly groomy thingys that sometimes make us feel better…
still hadn’t found the calm or release I desperately needed…
So I grabbed the container I use for water… filled it slowly… and walked down the stairs.. gingerly… with my broken tailbone… fucked up knees (it was 5 degrees yesterday) … and broken toe… all of these things are a story of their own… that I am just plain tired of writing about… so use your imagination…
I opened the door to my paint room… I lit a candle… some incense .. plugged in the phone to a speaker… played my favorite genre off of Pandora… and I painted…
I took a HUGE canvas I had received for Christmas from small child and just let myself blend the colors and cover the canvas… I had an idea of what I wanted this to be… but I felt the need to make the color so rich… and the paint so thick… that I wouldn’t be able to finish it…
So I took another canvas that I had already painted the background of and practiced… here is the start of it… I will post it when it is finished… and then I will attempt to do something similar on the giant canvas… 
and I felt peace…
With every stroke of the brush… and every layer of color… I felt the stress and anxiety leave me… and lost track of time… and forgot about the pain… It was truly a release through creativity… I intend to work on it again tonight.
UPDATED:
Still not done- but further along… also… completely unrelated… I love you people
Oh you have a talent I wish I had. To be able to use paint and a brush to release some of what seems trapped inside you. It’s beautiful, truly beautiful. I’m a little jealous! 🙂
Thank you! You made my day!
I wish I could draw or paint but alas my release is through writing or reading. I did find it hard to focus on one prompt this week!
They were some awesome prompts!
I feel peace too when I look at your painting!! I can’t wait to see it when it’s complete. I feel the same release when I journal…or blog…or let words flow out of me in any form. You are so right about experiencing release through creativity! I need to remind myself about that next time I get tangled up in my anxieties!
Thank you so much!!! I actually updated it with a further along version! I am so glad to know I am not the only one!
Beautiful. I can see how that could restore your soul.